Finally Something About Me This Time

No this is not a review or input on something. Its about me this time haha. Let me give you an update. I kinda feel like typing a lot today. Just to rest my muscles that are soon to be gunz haha jp.

Thursday was going fine but did something i knew i shouldn't have done and procrastinate on studying for a midterm for Philosophy. I ended up taking my 2 hour break to TRY to read 2 long chapters (which i havent read before) off a computer screen (the whole book is typed on word) which hurt the shit out of my eyes. The worst part is that its on a computer! haha. That means im bound to distract myself by looking at useless information that wouldnt help me with the test (ie myspace, nba news, looking at blogs, trying to find something else to look at than the chapters). So by the time class began i didnt finish one chapter and didnt study to well as all i did was read the chapters without analyzing anything after i read parts. so that pretty much screwed me in the end as the test was insane. So that was a downer. I hate failing at things. Its something that easily gets me down and angry with myself. Especially when i know i could have done better and if its related to school. Thats because well...school is where life goes on (well in my case). If i fail going to school i fail a part of my life. Time doesn't stand still obviously. AS EACH DAY PASSES, I get a day older and they add up to weeks then months then years. I just don't want to look back and know that i failed something i could have accomplished. Call this cliche but ill say it anyway. You can't change the past. Now i know what you guys are thinking. "Chill out dood its only one exam" and i know that. But im just talking about failing in life in general and im sure all of you can agree with me with that topic. It all starts with little things. The thing is....I don't plan on failing.

As of now im pretty satisfied with everything going on with my life and i've learned to just say fuck it and just live it. Forget any problems that bother me and slow me down. I'm still young and my past is starting to be behind me. I'll admit that I have changed in the past couple of months and still changing as i speak. Even everyone i know is changing. But change is something that just happens and I just learn to accept it. Heh..this is a big step from years back. I'm coming from wanting to kill myself to just living the life i have. You only live once and God gave me the gift to live. I'm just happy that i never did what i felt like doing in the past. There's so much more for me to learn AS EACH DAY PASSES.

Let's cut the seriousness and just chill for a moment haha. To be honest, I wasnt planning to talk about that on here. I guess it just came up and as i was typing, one thought led to another and that came out. There's a lot of cliche quotes there but hey they are some true and deep words IMO. Anyway, so im just waiting till next thursday to see what i got on that midterm. If i don't do so hot it would all depend on the final on if i pass or not.

So it's been two weeks since i've been working out at home. Taking protein everyday and working out my arms most of the time and well..im lovin it! I also grabbed a 24 hour fitness gym pass today and i just got home from there. it's a pretty cool experience. I feel more motivated to work out there than at home and plus they got some crazy ass machines that of course i don't have. I describe it as what my friend who i saw there said. "It's like an amusement park" and well thats kind of what i see. So many machines to choose from haha. I only did a medium work out as i just wanted to check out the place. Theres people that look at me struggling to do a set amount of reps or pushing low weights (to them i guess) but i really don't care. Doesn't phaze me, I just keep saying...these fools were like me once. All in all, im liking the gym and plan to go ALMOST everyday. Gotta save a day or 2 to have some fun haha. Whoever is down to go with me let me know! I'm sure workouts are better when someone you know is around. But today it was just me and DJ ipod. I'm seeing some change in my body and that just motivates me to keep on pushing the weights. Whats even better, its increasing my self esteem and i know that the higher it is the happier i will get. I wish i did this a while ago!

Something thats also keeping me up is job hunting. It's that time again to find a job while holiday shopping is underway. Wednesday was the annual Fall job fair and there was a couple places i was interested in. So far i applied for Target, Old Navy, and Mt. High! If i had to choose which one i wanted most it would probably be Old Navy just for the fact that its not as far as Mt. High and it seems like it would be the more chill job. Target kind of reminds me of Wal-Mart (especially when its super target) and im not a fan of Wal-Mart. Watch this DVD called Wal-Mart: Low Prices at a High Cost (or something like that) and you'll see what i mean. Mt High is just far and i would have to do Canyon runs whenever i have to go to work haha jk. But it is pretty far. The upside to that is a $10 season pass and just being on the mountain most of the time which would be so dope. I still plan on applying to Best Buy and that is my #1! My favorite store! haha. Discounts babeh! Right now its all about the waiting game to see if they call.

Since i'm trying to get a job that means i would have to be tested and pretty much i've stopped smoking for a while and i like the feeling. I feel free and clean like all the toxins are releasing from my body. Especially when i break out a good sweat working out or playing tennis. I can't say it'll be a permanent thing but im down for it to be. But i doubt it's the end of that phase lol.

Last thing, I went on 1iota just to see who's performing on various shows and found TI to be sold out but saw my man John Legend not sold out and grabbed some tickets to that. It's only a mini concert but im still down! I'm pretty excited! I wanna see a full concert by him one day and especially a Jay-Z concert before that guy definitely retires. This is where the job kicks in haha. O and something else to add to my wish list is fuckin Laker's Tickets! I HAVE to see a game while Kobe is in his prime and i have to watch it from a good seat and not the top section where i usually sat in the past. I'm straight with somewhere under the suites.

Tomorrow (or should i say today) I'm gonna hit up the valley for cousin Fil's bday bar thing. I better get in! If i don't then damn...looks like ill be chillin in the car the rest of the night haha fuck that would suck.

-Brent